Saturday, March 31, 2007
I'M NOT GAY!
as it turns out, i can actually skate. and i can skate like the wind, i tell you.
again, i would like to reiterate, i'm not gay.
as it turns out, i can actually skate. and i can skate like the wind, i tell you.
again, i would like to reiterate, i'm not gay.
jacki and i figured out why i never smoked pot or even tried.
1) i'm a pretty mellow guy most of the time.
2) i always have the munchies
3) i see things differently than most people
4) i laugh at things that aren't funny
so you see, i've already got most of the symptoms. (at least, according to the movies i've seen)
and by avoiding the actual drug itself i've saved myself: money, from getting arrested or fired, perhaps brain cells and the fact that everything i own doesn't smell like poop.
of course, i'd be singin a different tune if it was about those sweet tasty caffeinated drinks.
i don't have a problem! you're the one with the problem!!!
i learned it from watching you, alright!!!!
...i like Star Wars and taco bell.
God bless America.
1) i'm a pretty mellow guy most of the time.
2) i always have the munchies
3) i see things differently than most people
4) i laugh at things that aren't funny
so you see, i've already got most of the symptoms. (at least, according to the movies i've seen)
and by avoiding the actual drug itself i've saved myself: money, from getting arrested or fired, perhaps brain cells and the fact that everything i own doesn't smell like poop.
of course, i'd be singin a different tune if it was about those sweet tasty caffeinated drinks.
i don't have a problem! you're the one with the problem!!!
i learned it from watching you, alright!!!!
...i like Star Wars and taco bell.
God bless America.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
nyaaaaaaaaah!
dangit!
i wish i didn't have to sleep.
...such a waste of time.
grr.
i wish i didn't have to sleep.
...such a waste of time.
grr.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
at last! the story of the balloon.
comic con, 2006. not the best comic book convention i've ever been to, but we made the best of it.
there was a lonely guy at a table drawing anything you wanted (within reason) on a balloon for 2 dollars American. we saw kids with Wolverine and Spider-Man on thier air filled canvases.
since john and i think differently than the average 12 year old (i hope)we went for some other ideas.
originally john wanted a fat girl riding a moped. and i gotta agree, that's funny any day of the week.
the artist suggested a self portrait. so heck yeah, he got his face immortalized on a balloon. well, as permanent as a balloon piece of art can be.
he was such a happy lil boy to have his face on a balloon.
as for me, i wanted sumthin else.
originally, i asked for something else than what i got as well.
what i asked for was this:
i wanted Ewoks from Star Wars fighting the Smurfs in an epic Braveheart like battle. and somehow have the Snorks involved as well.
he gave me that look i get form most people whenever i voice my thoughts, the look that says "what kind of crazy are you?"
he convinced me that would be "too involved" to put on a balloon. it was a small canvas.
so he offered to compromise and have an Ewok punching a Smurf in the face.
i was filled with glee.
we both paid for the helium filled masterpieces and tipped him an extra dollar for his trouble. he was a good sport.
this pic probably has an explanation, and it's probably creepy. just try to only look at the balloon...
the Ewok is proclaiming, "Smurf this! Yub, Yub!" while giving the hapless Smurf what for. i should have made sure that it was Brainy Smurf. i just hate him so much. (shakes fist)
so for that matter, it can be any Surf you don't like. whether it be Vanity Smurf or even a made up one, like Too Much Coffee Smurf or Always the Friend, Never the Boyfriend Smurf. You pick.
i eventually gave the balloon to some nice folks who gave me a free t-shirt. face it, who wants to carry a balloon around everywhere?
and then one time, Rachel drew me a picture of epic proportions. i think Barbie was involved. you will have to ask her.
or she could put the pic in the comment section. and you should leave a comment too. cuz remember, if you don't comment, you don't count.
kind of like the extras on Lost.
comic con, 2006. not the best comic book convention i've ever been to, but we made the best of it.
there was a lonely guy at a table drawing anything you wanted (within reason) on a balloon for 2 dollars American. we saw kids with Wolverine and Spider-Man on thier air filled canvases.
since john and i think differently than the average 12 year old (i hope)we went for some other ideas.
originally john wanted a fat girl riding a moped. and i gotta agree, that's funny any day of the week.
the artist suggested a self portrait. so heck yeah, he got his face immortalized on a balloon. well, as permanent as a balloon piece of art can be.
he was such a happy lil boy to have his face on a balloon.
as for me, i wanted sumthin else.
originally, i asked for something else than what i got as well.
what i asked for was this:
i wanted Ewoks from Star Wars fighting the Smurfs in an epic Braveheart like battle. and somehow have the Snorks involved as well.
he gave me that look i get form most people whenever i voice my thoughts, the look that says "what kind of crazy are you?"
he convinced me that would be "too involved" to put on a balloon. it was a small canvas.
so he offered to compromise and have an Ewok punching a Smurf in the face.
i was filled with glee.
we both paid for the helium filled masterpieces and tipped him an extra dollar for his trouble. he was a good sport.
this pic probably has an explanation, and it's probably creepy. just try to only look at the balloon...
the Ewok is proclaiming, "Smurf this! Yub, Yub!" while giving the hapless Smurf what for. i should have made sure that it was Brainy Smurf. i just hate him so much. (shakes fist)
so for that matter, it can be any Surf you don't like. whether it be Vanity Smurf or even a made up one, like Too Much Coffee Smurf or Always the Friend, Never the Boyfriend Smurf. You pick.
i eventually gave the balloon to some nice folks who gave me a free t-shirt. face it, who wants to carry a balloon around everywhere?
and then one time, Rachel drew me a picture of epic proportions. i think Barbie was involved. you will have to ask her.
or she could put the pic in the comment section. and you should leave a comment too. cuz remember, if you don't comment, you don't count.
kind of like the extras on Lost.
Monday, March 19, 2007
the bucket of truth.
alright. since jordan was the only one with the chutzpah to make a comment (the rest of you are a bunch of sissies) i'm gonna rant offa what he said.
attention younger viewers: the following work you are about to read will be unrehearsed, unrelenting, unleashed, uneven, unfair, unmitigated, unprepared and most importantly, unrated.
and that does really grind my gears when i can't find the droids i'm looking for. what's upi with that? for years i been wantin to get a tattoo. but what got in the way would have been time and money. i know good artists, but don't feel like driving out to them. especially since the money i would have set aside would be spent before then anyway. and now i've made it to the age of 32 without getting inked, and so now the thrill may be gone. ah, well. but the tattoo i did decide on was going to be of a droid from star wars. not one the gay ones that luke owned like threepio. but one of the cool looking worker droids. but that may take too much explaining. i know a guy that has an ice cream cone and building blocks on his arm. he is made fun of due to it, alot. he takes it in stride but i just don't want to be that guy. you just can't be a fan of what you truly like around everybody. i like star wars and taco bell. somedays i do wish i fit into the typical mold that the majority seems to be poured from. take music for instance. i have to reload my ipod with tunes due to the fact that i restored it to factory settings. long story short, i clicked the wrong button. twice. i'm tryin to listen to music at work without anybody raising any eyebrows, but it's hard when you've only loaded bands like big audio dynamite, blaster the rocket boy and breakfast with amy. (i'm pickin on the B's cuz that's what it is currently on) i've never been one of those who lets the radio dictate what i'm going to listen to at the time. it's like giving up your soul. i wish i was into zombie movies, but they never did appeal to me. i've never seen gone with the wind either. although, i'm sure there are no zombies in that movie. it might be an improvement. i think i saw the movie titanic maybe twice. i remember liking it, but the girly masses kind of ruined that ride for me. i haven't seen the notebook for that same reason. it could hold the secret of life and exude the smell of freshly baked cookies as you watch it, but i may never know. cuz girls gush about it and men gripe about having had to have seen it on a date. my wife still owes me for making me watch notting hill. course, she says the same thing about fight club. i hope at least one guy who reads this goes, "yeah!!! fight club!!!" the spiders are making webs in between the star wars figures i've got on my shelf. that means its time to clean. i just imagine them jumping from bossk to chewbacca going "weeeee!" i found the purple medley by Prince. it's eleven minutes of like every popular Prince song. it rocks. i still can't explain why i'm a Prince fan. i could probably blame kevin smith, but i think all he did was rekindle it. my favorite band is still They Might Be Giants. that's not really a step up or even a step sideways. i'm just weird. the indians call it maize. the teletubbies really freaked me out. i was changing channels one day and i came across an episode and i believed it was the beginning of the end. it's a darn good thing i never took drugs. especially that day. i probably would have jumped out a window, and i was on the first floor. i still can't believe john threw that fake TV at me. sabrina broke my finger. i wonder how much an orange jumpsuit would cost, and where i could find it. with no questions asked. i've been reading too many comic books lately. i need to read books without pictures in them. i've got a stack waiting to be read. especially the neil gaiman titles. or even the Bible. i hear that's got a lot of answers in it. ...but i know how it ends though. God wins, by the way. hope i didn't spoil it for you. great ending though. there's dragons and fire and demon frogs and dead horses and sheep. i doubt there will ever be a good movie made about it. probably not even a good cartoon. even with the CGI these days. stinkin hollywood. in a world where dreamgirls can be considered for the oscars... anyway! i got in big trouble for making the "DING!" sound every time the woman i married said that her head hurt. it was all in good fun. y'know, like when another number gets added to a counter. best example i could give you would be like the disney movie hercules when the sould dies and gets added to hades and it says now serving: (whatever number they have) "DING!" i was considering making it a drinking game. but i don't drink and i'm in enough trouble for the ding comment anyways. now i better say something nice to make up for that tomfoolery i just mentioned. actually, i'm crazy bout the woman. it's nice to have your up's and down's with the person you chose. it ain't easy. but she's worth it. i'm startin to sound sappy. and i'd better stop. especially since i'm currently listening to, yup you guessed it, Prince. and my thoughts could easily turn from nice to naughty. maybe i should switch over to Moby. but then my thoughts would switch over to confused and vegetarian. well, it's time to shake the magic eight ball and see what it says for you. ask a question while i shake... the eight ball says, "My sources say no." so there. the fates have decided. it's time for me to stop. next time i rant like this, i will be sure to be sleep deprived with at least one energy drink in me. probably a Rockstar. they are only 1.49 at save-a-lot. i hope nobody ruins that store. i need a place where i can buy .99 cent nachos and .69 cent 2 liter of Dr. Pop. but that's just me being hopeful in an area that becomes more and more hopeless. but cheer up. there are good movies coming out this spring and summer.
next: the story of the balloon.
alright. since jordan was the only one with the chutzpah to make a comment (the rest of you are a bunch of sissies) i'm gonna rant offa what he said.
attention younger viewers: the following work you are about to read will be unrehearsed, unrelenting, unleashed, uneven, unfair, unmitigated, unprepared and most importantly, unrated.
and that does really grind my gears when i can't find the droids i'm looking for. what's upi with that? for years i been wantin to get a tattoo. but what got in the way would have been time and money. i know good artists, but don't feel like driving out to them. especially since the money i would have set aside would be spent before then anyway. and now i've made it to the age of 32 without getting inked, and so now the thrill may be gone. ah, well. but the tattoo i did decide on was going to be of a droid from star wars. not one the gay ones that luke owned like threepio. but one of the cool looking worker droids. but that may take too much explaining. i know a guy that has an ice cream cone and building blocks on his arm. he is made fun of due to it, alot. he takes it in stride but i just don't want to be that guy. you just can't be a fan of what you truly like around everybody. i like star wars and taco bell. somedays i do wish i fit into the typical mold that the majority seems to be poured from. take music for instance. i have to reload my ipod with tunes due to the fact that i restored it to factory settings. long story short, i clicked the wrong button. twice. i'm tryin to listen to music at work without anybody raising any eyebrows, but it's hard when you've only loaded bands like big audio dynamite, blaster the rocket boy and breakfast with amy. (i'm pickin on the B's cuz that's what it is currently on) i've never been one of those who lets the radio dictate what i'm going to listen to at the time. it's like giving up your soul. i wish i was into zombie movies, but they never did appeal to me. i've never seen gone with the wind either. although, i'm sure there are no zombies in that movie. it might be an improvement. i think i saw the movie titanic maybe twice. i remember liking it, but the girly masses kind of ruined that ride for me. i haven't seen the notebook for that same reason. it could hold the secret of life and exude the smell of freshly baked cookies as you watch it, but i may never know. cuz girls gush about it and men gripe about having had to have seen it on a date. my wife still owes me for making me watch notting hill. course, she says the same thing about fight club. i hope at least one guy who reads this goes, "yeah!!! fight club!!!" the spiders are making webs in between the star wars figures i've got on my shelf. that means its time to clean. i just imagine them jumping from bossk to chewbacca going "weeeee!" i found the purple medley by Prince. it's eleven minutes of like every popular Prince song. it rocks. i still can't explain why i'm a Prince fan. i could probably blame kevin smith, but i think all he did was rekindle it. my favorite band is still They Might Be Giants. that's not really a step up or even a step sideways. i'm just weird. the indians call it maize. the teletubbies really freaked me out. i was changing channels one day and i came across an episode and i believed it was the beginning of the end. it's a darn good thing i never took drugs. especially that day. i probably would have jumped out a window, and i was on the first floor. i still can't believe john threw that fake TV at me. sabrina broke my finger. i wonder how much an orange jumpsuit would cost, and where i could find it. with no questions asked. i've been reading too many comic books lately. i need to read books without pictures in them. i've got a stack waiting to be read. especially the neil gaiman titles. or even the Bible. i hear that's got a lot of answers in it. ...but i know how it ends though. God wins, by the way. hope i didn't spoil it for you. great ending though. there's dragons and fire and demon frogs and dead horses and sheep. i doubt there will ever be a good movie made about it. probably not even a good cartoon. even with the CGI these days. stinkin hollywood. in a world where dreamgirls can be considered for the oscars... anyway! i got in big trouble for making the "DING!" sound every time the woman i married said that her head hurt. it was all in good fun. y'know, like when another number gets added to a counter. best example i could give you would be like the disney movie hercules when the sould dies and gets added to hades and it says now serving: (whatever number they have) "DING!" i was considering making it a drinking game. but i don't drink and i'm in enough trouble for the ding comment anyways. now i better say something nice to make up for that tomfoolery i just mentioned. actually, i'm crazy bout the woman. it's nice to have your up's and down's with the person you chose. it ain't easy. but she's worth it. i'm startin to sound sappy. and i'd better stop. especially since i'm currently listening to, yup you guessed it, Prince. and my thoughts could easily turn from nice to naughty. maybe i should switch over to Moby. but then my thoughts would switch over to confused and vegetarian. well, it's time to shake the magic eight ball and see what it says for you. ask a question while i shake... the eight ball says, "My sources say no." so there. the fates have decided. it's time for me to stop. next time i rant like this, i will be sure to be sleep deprived with at least one energy drink in me. probably a Rockstar. they are only 1.49 at save-a-lot. i hope nobody ruins that store. i need a place where i can buy .99 cent nachos and .69 cent 2 liter of Dr. Pop. but that's just me being hopeful in an area that becomes more and more hopeless. but cheer up. there are good movies coming out this spring and summer.
next: the story of the balloon.
Friday, March 16, 2007
my internet is down due to the fact that "the man" didnt get his money on time. it should be unavailable in the Spacey household til say, probably monday.
so for those of you who need a spacemanrocks.com fix between then and now i might suggest a few things:
1) Frisbee golf.
2) trying not to kill yourself on a pogo stick.
3) lawn darts. rare, i know. again, try not to kill yourself.
4) croquet. try not to kill the other guy with the mallet. i know it's tempting...
5) paintball. remember to protect all your parts and pieces.
6) baking cookies for Space. i do loves me some cookies. or better yet, cake. mmm cake.
7) three hyphenated words: build-a-bear.
8) throwing powdered donuts at business men in black suits.
9) watch the movie 300. ...again.
10) clean out my garage in order to flush out Dinglenoose and give him no place to hide. (shakes fist)
well, there's some suggestions. i hope you have a great stinkin weekend no matter what you end up doing.
the next time i write , i would like to just go on a rant based on whatever is left in the comment section. so if you wanna see your idea immortalized on spacemanrocks.com then don't be afraid to leave a message on whatever you're thinkin about. feel free to be anonymous, i know its hard to leave a comment thanks to google.
but keep it clean and nice. remember, your mom reads this site too.
asalamalaka.
so for those of you who need a spacemanrocks.com fix between then and now i might suggest a few things:
1) Frisbee golf.
2) trying not to kill yourself on a pogo stick.
3) lawn darts. rare, i know. again, try not to kill yourself.
4) croquet. try not to kill the other guy with the mallet. i know it's tempting...
5) paintball. remember to protect all your parts and pieces.
6) baking cookies for Space. i do loves me some cookies. or better yet, cake. mmm cake.
7) three hyphenated words: build-a-bear.
8) throwing powdered donuts at business men in black suits.
9) watch the movie 300. ...again.
10) clean out my garage in order to flush out Dinglenoose and give him no place to hide. (shakes fist)
well, there's some suggestions. i hope you have a great stinkin weekend no matter what you end up doing.
the next time i write , i would like to just go on a rant based on whatever is left in the comment section. so if you wanna see your idea immortalized on spacemanrocks.com then don't be afraid to leave a message on whatever you're thinkin about. feel free to be anonymous, i know its hard to leave a comment thanks to google.
but keep it clean and nice. remember, your mom reads this site too.
asalamalaka.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
wendy?
yes, lisa.
is the water warm, wendy?
yes, lisa.
shall we begin?
yes, lisa.
...
i finally got around to watching the Prince movie Under the Cherry Moon.
one of the worst movies i've ever seen.
and yes, i've seen Gigli.
oh, by the way, Prince dies at the end.
there, i said it.
thank you Easter Bunny.
Bawk, bawk!
yes, lisa.
is the water warm, wendy?
yes, lisa.
shall we begin?
yes, lisa.
...
i finally got around to watching the Prince movie Under the Cherry Moon.
one of the worst movies i've ever seen.
and yes, i've seen Gigli.
oh, by the way, Prince dies at the end.
there, i said it.
thank you Easter Bunny.
Bawk, bawk!
Monday, March 05, 2007
so.
they closed down one of my favorite video stores nearby without warning.
at least, they forgot to tell me.
sad. shed a tear. moving on.
luckily, in it's place they erected a save-a-lot ( i think that's what it's called).
it's like an aldi or some other store that sells generic brands at affordable prices fo po folk like me. it's clean and nice looking right now. but these places tend to lose their luster over time. why people choose to ruin things i will never know. go ask your mom.
the point of this story is not about the store. sure i'm glad to have a place where i can but a full sized 89 cent bag of chips, but the heart of the matter is this:
i love generic brand names.
it's the same item.
probably the same ingredients.
quite possibly even made in the same location.
but yet, it has a name that is close enough to the original brand name to be recognizable but not sued for copyright infringement.
my favorite would be the selection of pop.
i.e. the wal-mart equivalent of mountain dew is mountain lightning.
i believe save-a-lot sported the title, mountain hopper... i think.
but oddly enough, it had no caffeine.
so i went for the Dr. Pepper knock-off, Dr. Pop.
it's like they are not even trying anymore.
http://www.marion.ohio-state.edu/fac/schul/drp/kr.html
hopefully, the link above works.
but i found out the many guises of imitation Dr. Pepper.
one of my favorites being Dr. Publix. where'd they pull that one from?
anyway, i hope you see my point.
a light that burns twice as bright burns half as long.
p.s. bring back JOLT RED and i will buy you something shiny.
they closed down one of my favorite video stores nearby without warning.
at least, they forgot to tell me.
sad. shed a tear. moving on.
luckily, in it's place they erected a save-a-lot ( i think that's what it's called).
it's like an aldi or some other store that sells generic brands at affordable prices fo po folk like me. it's clean and nice looking right now. but these places tend to lose their luster over time. why people choose to ruin things i will never know. go ask your mom.
the point of this story is not about the store. sure i'm glad to have a place where i can but a full sized 89 cent bag of chips, but the heart of the matter is this:
i love generic brand names.
it's the same item.
probably the same ingredients.
quite possibly even made in the same location.
but yet, it has a name that is close enough to the original brand name to be recognizable but not sued for copyright infringement.
my favorite would be the selection of pop.
i.e. the wal-mart equivalent of mountain dew is mountain lightning.
i believe save-a-lot sported the title, mountain hopper... i think.
but oddly enough, it had no caffeine.
so i went for the Dr. Pepper knock-off, Dr. Pop.
it's like they are not even trying anymore.
http://www.marion.ohio-state.edu/fac/schul/drp/kr.html
hopefully, the link above works.
but i found out the many guises of imitation Dr. Pepper.
one of my favorites being Dr. Publix. where'd they pull that one from?
anyway, i hope you see my point.
a light that burns twice as bright burns half as long.
p.s. bring back JOLT RED and i will buy you something shiny.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
SPARTA!!!
Saturday, March 03, 2007
