Saturday, November 11, 2006
Dinglenoose eats his young.
from time to time, mice get into my garage to chew on everything, poop and pee on all surfaces imaginable and ruin my life.
they are all controlled by the personal demon assigned to me, Dinglenoose.
at first we put out mousey poison to kill them. that worked, but instead of going off somewhere else to die (like they were supposed to) they crawled into a storage box and withered away. leaving a stink that made your flesh curl.
my wifey, being proactive in the mousehunt, bought these plastic mouse traps that snap.
ya bait em with peanut butter. mmmm peanut butter, (SNAP) ow! that's the third time today!
anyway.
it's my job as the man is to set, and more impotantly, empty the traps.
and i'm glad it's my job, cuz i'm pretty sure my wife would throw up if she had to do it.
these traps are gruesome.
they don't just trap the mouse, they straight up squish the mouse.
a more accurate description would be that they squeeze so hard and so fast that their guts shoot out.
yup, gross.
well, i had to throw a trap away this week. here's why:
i re-baited the traps with gobs of oh so tasty peanut butter. which by next morning had claimed another victim. except that this tiny mouse seemed to have a pretty good story to tell from his demise.
i'm guessing when the trap shut down on him he tried to escape by running further into the trap. so it ended up clamping down on his lil mousey butt.
which squeezed out his last poop and pee which i figure is his final "screw you" to his killers. i.e. me and wifey.
so his wee head was almost sticking out of the back of the device. he must have put up quite a struggle.
i found him in the morning before going to work and didn't have time to pry him free. so i left him to take care of after my business day.
the story gets mysterious...
when i get home, i see that the trap has been moved about 6-8 inches from where it was. then i picked it up and saw that something had eaten the mouses face off.
now that raises a lotta questions!
1) do mice eat other mice?
2) is there something else living in my garage that i need to set a bigger trap for?
3) was this little guy in trouble with the mouse mafia? was he made an example of?
4) do androids dream of electric sheep?
5) will i ever be debt free?
6) what will it take to make Dinglenoose to stop?
7) what killed the dinosaurs?
8) will my hair ever grow back?
9) can mr. Fantastic of the Fantastic Four stretch every part of his body?
10) will they ever release "parker lewis can't fail" on DVD?
well, there ya have it. another Dinglenoose story.
i know ya love em.
maybe that's why he won't stop.
it's a symbiotic relationship.
i'm gonna go eat tacos and watch star wars now.
from time to time, mice get into my garage to chew on everything, poop and pee on all surfaces imaginable and ruin my life.
they are all controlled by the personal demon assigned to me, Dinglenoose.
at first we put out mousey poison to kill them. that worked, but instead of going off somewhere else to die (like they were supposed to) they crawled into a storage box and withered away. leaving a stink that made your flesh curl.
my wifey, being proactive in the mousehunt, bought these plastic mouse traps that snap.
ya bait em with peanut butter. mmmm peanut butter, (SNAP) ow! that's the third time today!
anyway.
it's my job as the man is to set, and more impotantly, empty the traps.
and i'm glad it's my job, cuz i'm pretty sure my wife would throw up if she had to do it.
these traps are gruesome.
they don't just trap the mouse, they straight up squish the mouse.
a more accurate description would be that they squeeze so hard and so fast that their guts shoot out.
yup, gross.
well, i had to throw a trap away this week. here's why:
i re-baited the traps with gobs of oh so tasty peanut butter. which by next morning had claimed another victim. except that this tiny mouse seemed to have a pretty good story to tell from his demise.
i'm guessing when the trap shut down on him he tried to escape by running further into the trap. so it ended up clamping down on his lil mousey butt.
which squeezed out his last poop and pee which i figure is his final "screw you" to his killers. i.e. me and wifey.
so his wee head was almost sticking out of the back of the device. he must have put up quite a struggle.
i found him in the morning before going to work and didn't have time to pry him free. so i left him to take care of after my business day.
the story gets mysterious...
when i get home, i see that the trap has been moved about 6-8 inches from where it was. then i picked it up and saw that something had eaten the mouses face off.
now that raises a lotta questions!
1) do mice eat other mice?
2) is there something else living in my garage that i need to set a bigger trap for?
3) was this little guy in trouble with the mouse mafia? was he made an example of?
4) do androids dream of electric sheep?
5) will i ever be debt free?
6) what will it take to make Dinglenoose to stop?
7) what killed the dinosaurs?
8) will my hair ever grow back?
9) can mr. Fantastic of the Fantastic Four stretch every part of his body?
10) will they ever release "parker lewis can't fail" on DVD?
well, there ya have it. another Dinglenoose story.
i know ya love em.
maybe that's why he won't stop.
it's a symbiotic relationship.
i'm gonna go eat tacos and watch star wars now.
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Long story short (too late!) we had mice in our basement at the farm. No big surprise - mice on a farm, right? That changed the day my wife claimed to see a racoon or other large mammal in the kitchen. Further investigation found lots of dog food chunks (1/2 sized inch or so) in the cusions of the couch and behind the stove (where we ate food from!!!). So, the so-called racoon had been sleeping over for awhile. I set mousetraps, thinking that there's no way there was really a racoon. First victim was a mouse, or should I say - half a mouse. The other half was mysteriously missing. I set the trap again - this time, a little mouse spine was left behind. Set trap again - the guts of the mouse were pulled outside the mouse skin. Set trap again - the trap dissappeared. No kidding - I found it months later in the corner under the old oil heater - empty... At this point, I'm starting to get freaked out. I got bigger traps. This time, I caught a 12-inch grain rat. I have pictures - I didn't believe it either. This continued with trapping 3 (I think) of these big rats until I found the hole in the foundation where the rats were getting in. Now I know why the cats didn't like going down there sometimes... I'll try to remember to bring the pictures on friday. Maybe you can post them in the garage as a warning - kind of like human skulls on sticks...
# posted by 
: 9:31 PM
: 9:31 PM
You're right. That was gross. You should've taken a picture for all of us to see. lol Once! We had mice at my last house and you'd be walking and a little mouse would be running and just as your foot would be going down the mouse would end up under there. It happened twice. Once my little sister stepped on a mouse and another time I did. It was sick! Another time my mom ran over a mouse with the car in our garage as she was parking... of course we didn't find out until she moved the car and it was as flat as a pancake. That was pretty gross cleaning up. One last time was when we broke some glass and we found a mouse with glass in it's foot and we tried to nurse him back to health... it didn't work... the poor mouse died. lol everyone has these stories!
everyone has their own Dinglenoose.
i just hope we don't have this rat problem. i like the idea of the mouse mafia instead.
feggidabowdit.
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i just hope we don't have this rat problem. i like the idea of the mouse mafia instead.
feggidabowdit.
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