Wednesday, December 22, 2004
alright, first off let's get one thing straight: there is no santa claus.
ok, moving on here.
my wife and i weren't going to go into the whole santa thing with our daughter. it was a tough decision. it largely rested on the fact that we would upset other relatives of ours that may or may not teach their kids about santa and let them believe until high skool graduation.
we were going to teach her that santa was once a nice man named klaus who brought toys to those in need.
the idea was to bring the focus in her mind that Christmas was about the birth of Christ.
not that we are religious fanatics who want to shun out everything in the world that may lead us into temptation such as chewing gum, books with non-fictional characters or movies above a G rating or even starring david hasselhoff.
i like exchanging presents just as much or even more than anybody, we were just going to keep santa alive in movies and malls.
when my wife first pitched the idea of not having saint nick as part of our Christmas morning thingie i got that evil grin i get sometimes. i immediately thought about the bratty kid in skools who goes around telling other kids that there is no santa claus, and works in the death of the easter bunny too. kids go crying home to mommy and/or daddy and they spend hours on the couch either talking their kids back into the mythology or spring the truth on them prematurely and just get it over with. worst case scenario, kids she tells go through years of therapy due to having this surprise thrown at them before they were ready to handle the shock.
way to go kid!
but alas, there would also be the phone calls from disgruntled parents who would feel the need to yell at me about how i raise my kid.
that's why i have caller I.D.
but no, my wife had the plan to ease our kid into and out of it. mommy and daddy do the whole present thing. santa brings the stocking. we were going to let her know to respect other kids and how they do the entire santa bizness.
but here's the reality of the situation:
she's in pre skool. she's surrounded by the king of the elves and his paraphenalia. it's cute actually. she comes home and tells me that santa is going to give her toys, not reindeer poop, daddy! her teached tells that bad kids get reindeer poop, when i grew up, it was coal. but reindeer poop is even less rewarding. even bob cratchett would have gone nutzoid if someone gave him coal to warm his white trash family.
anywho, so my daughter believes that santa is going to bring her toys on baby Jesus birthday. like i said, cute.
cuz on the other hand, she also goes to sunday school. and she gets a lot out of that. hopefully, she's pretty well balanced.
oh, by the way. she's terrified of anybody dressed in a santa suit. that's not my fault.
ok, moving on here.
my wife and i weren't going to go into the whole santa thing with our daughter. it was a tough decision. it largely rested on the fact that we would upset other relatives of ours that may or may not teach their kids about santa and let them believe until high skool graduation.
we were going to teach her that santa was once a nice man named klaus who brought toys to those in need.
the idea was to bring the focus in her mind that Christmas was about the birth of Christ.
not that we are religious fanatics who want to shun out everything in the world that may lead us into temptation such as chewing gum, books with non-fictional characters or movies above a G rating or even starring david hasselhoff.
i like exchanging presents just as much or even more than anybody, we were just going to keep santa alive in movies and malls.
when my wife first pitched the idea of not having saint nick as part of our Christmas morning thingie i got that evil grin i get sometimes. i immediately thought about the bratty kid in skools who goes around telling other kids that there is no santa claus, and works in the death of the easter bunny too. kids go crying home to mommy and/or daddy and they spend hours on the couch either talking their kids back into the mythology or spring the truth on them prematurely and just get it over with. worst case scenario, kids she tells go through years of therapy due to having this surprise thrown at them before they were ready to handle the shock.
way to go kid!
but alas, there would also be the phone calls from disgruntled parents who would feel the need to yell at me about how i raise my kid.
that's why i have caller I.D.
but no, my wife had the plan to ease our kid into and out of it. mommy and daddy do the whole present thing. santa brings the stocking. we were going to let her know to respect other kids and how they do the entire santa bizness.
but here's the reality of the situation:
she's in pre skool. she's surrounded by the king of the elves and his paraphenalia. it's cute actually. she comes home and tells me that santa is going to give her toys, not reindeer poop, daddy! her teached tells that bad kids get reindeer poop, when i grew up, it was coal. but reindeer poop is even less rewarding. even bob cratchett would have gone nutzoid if someone gave him coal to warm his white trash family.
anywho, so my daughter believes that santa is going to bring her toys on baby Jesus birthday. like i said, cute.
cuz on the other hand, she also goes to sunday school. and she gets a lot out of that. hopefully, she's pretty well balanced.
oh, by the way. she's terrified of anybody dressed in a santa suit. that's not my fault.
