Lightsabers and Lollipops

well, the fiasco with the legos is over at last. they got a few good licks in, but i still feel that i won the fight! anyway, getting back the matter at hand: why children and small dogs hate me.

did you ever notice that in movies, when someone is evil or has a sense of foreboding about them that children cry and dogs bark at them? well, that leads me to my conclusion.

i am inherently evil.

i'm crazy. i'm stark raving mad! i sleep with my socks on! i'm slashing prices! i miss the toilet seat on purpose!

actually, to tell you the truth, none of these things are true of me. i'm a just a big bald teddy bear. children actually like me for some odd reason. i'm the one who is afraid of small children... and camels.

and little dogs? they're just jealous.