Lightsabers and Lollipops

ATTICA ! ATTICA!




aww man! not again! what'd i do now?

for some reason you need to have key lime pie.
right. now.

this is a family website, so it is edited for our younger and more sensitive viewers.




this my friends, is a bucket of s**t.

there's not a whole lot of other ways to put it when you have to stand 2 feet away from it to work on the pool equipment.

the proud owner's of this bucket have like 2 or 3 dogs. so i'm pretty sure that's where the poopies came from.
at least i hope so.
it's a house near a farm so i think they use it for manure.
at least i hope so.

looks like they been collecting a while.

ah well.
people and their hobbies...

i like Star Wars and Taco Bell.

they're in the walls.


so my wifey called me over to the wall in our bedroom and told me to shush and listen. and sure enough, there is a scratching noise from inside the walls.
it was creepy. it was a constant "skitch skitch skitch."
we were wondering how it got in there and if it was bringing friends and most importantly, how to get rid of it. we figured it was a mouse. at least we were hoping it was something that small. we were also hoping it was also singular. not breeding and making babies in the walls. there were some plans to make a small hole in the wall and drop in some poison and hopefully problem solved.
but after a day the scratching became a bit slower. so we came to the decision to wait it out and see if it would just die of natural causes trapped in the wall.
and sure enough, the scratching dwindled down to nothing.

and then, the smell.

yup. dead animal in the wall. what ya gonna do?
spray some febreze (constantly) turn on the fans and open the windows. woo.

but at least the scratching stopped. now there's a little skeleton in the wall.

DINGLENOOOOOOOOOOOOOSE!!!!!!


on a lighter note: while i was writing this, i was watching "From justin to kelly."
i wanted to see the worst movie ever made.
i've already seen Gigli. but this movie is just as bad if not worse.
it's a great train wreck of a movie. i highly suggest NOT seeing it.


Drink Pepsi.

Greedy Green Lantern.




why this Green Lantern needed two rings i do not know.i'm sure there's a story behind it. the best one i could think about right now is that one controls the TV and one controls the dvd player. i'm sure i could think of a more comic booky reason why, but let's not hurt ourselves thinking too hard today. just relax and keep telling yourself, "it's only a website."


and if you haven't seen dr. horrible's sing-a-long blog, then shame on you!

http://www.drhorrible.com/

watch it. love it. live it.


p.s. i do love the Meijer brand of imitation pops and their logo.
the slogan on the side of DR. M simply states, "DRINK IT! LOVE IT!"

very commanding. you must obey.

this has been an uneventful week, and i have been a lazy lazy man.

so i have every intention of writing something funny witty and chocolate soon. have patience my young smurfs.




oh. and,

sleep tight.

OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWOUCH!!!





ow. ow. ow. ow. ow. owie. owie. owie. ow. ow.


fffffft, ahhhhh. fffft, ahhhh. fffft, ahhh. ffffft, ahhhh. fffffffffffffffft, ahhhh.

that hurt.

do spiders poop?

is the sticky webbing they shoot out of their butts considered their waste?

i never really looked into it but if that is true then every time i accidentally reach into or walk through a spider-web on my face and eyes then i'm coming in direct contact with spider-dookie.

...and that makes me hate them even more.

it looks like he's asking permission to stab me.

SHOULD I DO IT KIDS? SHOULD I???

kids answer enthusiastically: YEAAAAAAAHHH!!!

and so ends the Spaceman.


impaled before a live studio audience.

the 4 x 4. the burger my friends all order. but for some reason it was too much for me. maybe a few days straight of overeating might have applied to these circumstances. i don't know. what i do know is that i can usually pound down the pounds. and now, i know my limits. gettin older, but not necessarily wiser as fast as the older part. the scale is not balanced.

(after this i started to write more, but it got too wordy, preachy and not funny. i try to avoid that on this website sooo...)

on a lighter note: CLOWNS.

the squirrel and the hippo. both natural enemies in the wild. but during Vegasmas in F.A.O. Schwartz at Caesar's Palace everybody gets along in almost perfect harmony.


except for the Todd Mcfarlane toys. they were just plain scary.









i may have to cancel Christmas again this year. be warned.

if worse comes to worse, you can always make up a holiday. ..like kwanzaa.

HIIII-YA!