Lightsabers and Lollipops

usually for the stinkin holidays people put up a pic of a tree or funny lil statues.

so here's both.


(gasp) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! (sniff) WHY?! ...why...

so my Christmas tree fell down today.

on my one year old son.

twice.

the first time i did catch it from falling all the way to the ground. kinda freaked him out. he cried. and for the record, the tree never really fell on him. he was mostly on the side. still made him sob. but he got over it and started playing with another toy pretty quick.

but alas, there were casualties.
2 out of 3 wisemen bought it. and some ornaments too. the ornaments were to be expected, but the poor innocent bystander wisemen from the nativity set, that was just sad.
i think i can save one. only his head fell off. clean cut.
but the other... well, his head broke into many, many bits, and i can't find his face. so it maaaaay be a lost cause.



aaaaaand here's a pic of the tree. it's leaning against the wall. waiting to be stripped of it's remaining ornaments and tossed to the curb.
so, let's recap:
i was sick through Cristmas day (pooped alot, when i wasn't sleepin)
The Godfather of Soul dies.
and the tree falls on my son. twice.

so yeah, i still dislike Christmas very alot.

p.s.

i did get away with boycotting Christmas for the most part.
this was probably the only year i can pull that off, due to wifey picking up the slack. but i can't get away with doing as little as possible concerning the holidays again. this was a one time stunt. but time will tell.

"there's a Festivus for the rest of us!!!"

never stop to explain the joke.
if you do that, life's not worth living.

Culver's needs TWO drink machines.

there, i said it.

i've been too sleepy to come up with original ideas for all 'a' you's.

but take heart, don't despair and don't touch my stuff. cuz i've got lots of ideas and jelly filled fun coming for all the fans and passers by of spacemanrocks.com

i just want to do the stories justice. and i can't in my current mental state. must... sleep...now.

... and then john peed in the parking lot of denny's.
.................before dining inside.

...still boycotting Christmas.

i saw a squirrel with only half a tail today.

so now i can cross that off my list.

...and then there was the time when john and short steve kidnapped me.

i blame matt.



i, i know he's just a robot and all but that just looks painful.
they removed his "special area" in order to place a roll of tape.
that "tape tearing" sound has a whole new meaning to me.
the morbidly funny thing is threepio's mouth is agape in absolute horror.
if you know your star wars, and you should, you would kow that C-3PO's mouth does not open and close. it's just a slight aperture in the metal so that anthony daniels wouldn't die encased in gold plating.
and is it me, or are his eyes just a little bit wider?
i don't have this piece of star wars paraphenalia, but i'm pretty sure it's not on the top of my list.
of course, now that i'm giving it a little kick into spacemanrocks fame it may have raised a few notches in it's popularity.
I'M WORLDWIDE, BABY!!!

...don't mess with Texas.

wunh wunh waaaa.


and that's why Ultra Magnus never became a Prime.

it's thinking...

ladies and gentlemen,

the cheesecake factory...



...OF THE GODS!!!!

they put too many raw onions in my fried rice today.
so i picked them out by hand.
now my fingers smell all onion-like.
so every time i pick my nose, i smell onions.
and i pick my nose alot.
i can never seem to get it totally cleaned out.
those stinkin boogers keep growing back.
i just wish the inside of my nose would stay clean, y'know?
people are always saying that i should use tissues instead.
but all that does for me is bring all the stuff in my nose to the edge.
or the front row.
and that just tickles my nose.
and so then i go diggin again.
which brings us back to square one.
and the smell of onions.
on my fingers.
that general tso's chicken was so very very good.
they pretty much give you two helpingswith that beautiful lunch special.
and that's okay with Spacey.
cuz i be hungry.
um,
God bless America!

i found out that my fire alarm works fine for all the right reasons today.

i'm pretty sure Dinglenoose has pulled the gloves off and is trying to kill me.

maybe the pressure is on from the higher demon management.

Dinglenoose's boss.

that's scary.

i guess he would ultimately answer to satan.

being a demon and all.

i wonder if he kills me does he get a promotion.

actually, i'm sure demons need to win your soul over to evil first, before the killing.

he would probably get a write-up for doing one without the other.

maybe i could get the catholics to exorcise him.

and then they could make an unrated movie about it.

and crappy sequels.

i want a piece of the merchandising.

my people will contact your people.

if i'm dead over this, talk to my wife.

just don't touch my stuff.

that gyro pizza was sohohohohooooooo good.
just when i didn't think i would find something more tasty and disgusting sounding than the gyro burger, bam!!! along comes the gyro pizza!

i wish i was eating it right now....

wel, now with a little time off from the pool bidness i can spend some time playin video games.

so... that means i'm back to yelling naughty words at my television that i hope the neighbors don't hear.

calling the game a "cheater" and whatnot. even though i should realize that i'm just bad at video games and most of it is my own fault.

i think i even yelled, "kill whitey!" at the screen while i was trying desperately to outrace the other electronically generated cars.

finding something more relaxing to do in my time off seems like a better idea.

but i just don't think i can get into scrapbooking at this point in my life.

"that red steel game is pretty tight."

i don't care what matt says,
i refuse to acknowledge that Dinglenoose has a big brother.


...so scared.